For this edition of the newsletter I am sharing excerpts from my notes from a lecture on the shadow that I attended in March which was led by Someone who Knows: The shadow can contain amazing qualities, but it is dark and mysterious and taboo. "I'm not a thief, but I steal from convenience stores when I'm drunk." This is an attempt to return to psychic wholeness, to acknowledge what is suppressed within us. Light: "I want to save everyone!" // Shadow: Uncompassionate acts. The shadow arrives when we are relaxed or tired. Light: "I'm LGBTQ+ friendly!" // Shadow: But actually not so much for trans people. We might enjoy having our boundaries crossed. We might enjoy crossing other people's boundaries. You can own your desire without acting on it: detached desire. Attachment: Needs from the chronically unmet self. "If you can't put something down, why?" When making sweeping generalizations, what we judge is in the shadow. "Oh my god in America everyone's dietary needs and neurodivergence is so much!" -> SHADOW Breadcrumb: Radical Honesty by Brad Blanton... RH with self, RH with others on a need-to-know basis, tearing down the identities that people place on you. Meet people's messes with compassion, understanding, and acceptance. Get curious, ask questions, assume the best in others. Things I made:
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My friend asked me: How did you find the questions you are most curious about, that you are asking constantly, that you are investigating with your life? How would you help someone else to find their own questions, their own curiosity? What does the activity of considering that bring up for you? And I answered: How I found the questions feels like a fish in water scenario. There's probably things from childhood that generated my fascination with other-connection, self-connection, creativity,...
Indirect mentors are people who do or say things that earn your admiration. There is no formal mentorship container, no contract, no "teach me your ways" agreement. Anyone can be an indirect mentor, and most indirect mentors don't know the full scope of their mentorship. Indirect mentors might be family, friends, lovers, coworkers, or people on social media. Anyone can easily benefit from the indirect mentors in their life. When someone earns your admiration, reflect on the cause, then...
Quick Announcement: I am sharing an offering called Internal Polarity Dialogue! This offer is for women who have a people-pleasing or self-sacrificing pattern. Through conversations with your inner masculine and feminine parts, you can move from feeling frustration or sadness around this pattern to feeling more resourced and empowered to honor and prioritize your wants and needs. Learn more by watching this video and apply for a session by filling out this form. I have been giving more of my...