How Loving Presence Makes Life Better
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I have been really enjoying loving presence lately. I believe it is an underutilized and underappreciated orientation towards any situation in life, but especially those where there is resistance or discomfort. But what is loving presence? It is simply to be both loving and present with whatever is in front of you. It is not partial presence, distracted by a screen or thoughts of the past or the future. It is not partial love, insisting that someone needs to be different than how they are. If you can only love someone if they change in some way, do you really love them? An example of a loving present thought is, "I love you, and I'm here with you." In my experience, this attitude has a profound effect on both its giver and its receiver. Loving presence might provide a shift away from a negative thought spiral or an awareness of one's power to choose how to respond to what life gives them. Loving presence is powerful and healing, and I want more people to know about it. Here are some recent examples of how I have used loving presence: A friend tells me about her romantic woes. She seems to know what she ought to do, but she is unwilling to do it. I listen to her with my full attention. I think, "I love you, and I'm here with you." I offer my perspective only when she solicits it. Someone blocks me on Twitter. I feel a reactive pang of resentment at first, which melts away with the thought, "I love you. Thank you for doing what you need to do to have your preferred experience on here." By choice, I stayed up too late last night. When I woke up this morning, I felt concerned about feeling tired later which could distract me from presence with the day's conversations and activities. I thought, "I love you. It's okay that you indulged in immediate gratification over delayed gratification. It's okay if you feel tired later." Here is a video I made in April where I talk about loving presence. Thanks for reading, and have a wonderful day. Cheers, Loop |
@strangestloop
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