I live for the moments when I realize that what I thought was true was in fact a story in my head. This had previously happened for me with love. I'd put love on a pedestal, saw it as this Big Serious Thing, Very Serious. And so I'd gatekept it from myself. I'd thought that if I didn't feel a Big Serious Feeling, then it wasn't love. But then I relaxed about it and understood that love is simply a state of being. It's in my thoughts and my words and my actions, big and small. Love is a part of our nature, no effort needs to be made. Love will be expressed. I've had a similar realization recently around intention. I'd thought that I needed to have a Big Legible Intention for my life, an elevator pitch, a thesis statement. Something explicit that I could tell people so that they could decide to opt in or opt out. But I've relaxed about intention, and I've found clarity. I don't have to have a sexy thesis statement about my intentions when I express them so clearly through my actions. I looked at what I do, and I assessed: Clearly I care about the flourishing of art and creativity. Clearly I care about understanding people. Clearly I care about articulating frameworks for living well. I did an exercise to understand my authentic code, a distillation of my core values and soul essence. A compass to show me what is and is not in alignment with my authentic self. The words I landed on were creativity, connection, freedom, and play. And so while I don't have an explicit statement of intention, I know that I've remained true to myself through my actions that honor those core values. I am an intentional person. I live intentionally. I trust that I will continue to do the actions that are aligned with my authentic code. I'm thinking from the end: I have the job. What did I do to get there? How did I stay true to myself along the way? As I keep moving forward, embracing uncertainty and loving the process, one thing remains clear: Keep creating. Keep giving. Things I made:
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When I find myself facing a temptation lately, remembering that the opposite is the medicine soothes me. I do the difficult task and abstain from the unhealthy food and tell myself the uncomfortable truth. These things don't feel good in the moment, but responding to life's tests by doing the opposite of what my habitual lower energy pattern would have me do is my self-loving, self-helping medicine. Knowing that makes it a bit easier to stomach. It's these small victories, these little...
A few weeks ago an impromptu collaboration on Twitter led to the creation of this meme: via @christineist on Twitter I enjoy and appreciate the many self-other love and growth loops in my life, and I think there is a lot to be gained from internalizing that you get to be your own friend. It's simple but not always easy: treat yourself how you want your friends to treat you. See the good in who you are and what you do. Take good care of yourself. When you're your own friend, your friendships...
My friend asked me: How did you find the questions you are most curious about, that you are asking constantly, that you are investigating with your life? How would you help someone else to find their own questions, their own curiosity? What does the activity of considering that bring up for you? And I answered: How I found the questions feels like a fish in water scenario. There's probably things from childhood that generated my fascination with other-connection, self-connection, creativity,...