Every Void Gets Filled
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Time is the ultimate constraint. Anything that happens takes time, and to expect to accomplish something without putting in the time to make it happen is a fantasy. A few weeks ago I tweeted: gentle reminder that less time spent scrolling creates a void that must necessarily be filled by something else. I seem to be looping back on my most popular talking point. Yes, desires and intentions and plans are wonderful for providing clarity and having the right mindset, but that's all pointless if you never actually do the thing. The filled void frame has been helpful for me lately in its simplicity: when I allocate time for a project, and I make it clear to myself that the allocated time is for the project and nothing else, then I necessarily make progress on the project. This progress might consist of visible progress like more words and new features, as well as invisible progress like trying something that doesn't work and exploring a different approach. But progress is only possible because I created a void to be filled by progress: I am choosing not to scroll social media, not to look at my phone, not to read newsletters ;^) It's perhaps an obvious point, but I think it's good for anyone to state the obvious in their own words. Have you tried setting aside time to focus on solving the problem? Things I made:
I am going to post a short essay every day in February on my Substack. Here are my favorite posts from the last time I wrote every day for a month: The RAMP Mindset, Polyamory and Status, Tacit Knowledge. This newsletter marks the 1-year anniversary of my coaching service! My clients have told me that my questions and reflections gently challenge their stories about what's happening without judgment. If you would like to have a call with me but the cost is an issue, please reach out. Thank you for reading! You can share this post with this link. If you want to support my work, you can check out my 1-1 coaching service or explore my website or buy me more time. |
@strangestloop
When I find myself facing a temptation lately, remembering that the opposite is the medicine soothes me. I do the difficult task and abstain from the unhealthy food and tell myself the uncomfortable truth. These things don't feel good in the moment, but responding to life's tests by doing the opposite of what my habitual lower energy pattern would have me do is my self-loving, self-helping medicine. Knowing that makes it a bit easier to stomach. It's these small victories, these little...
A few weeks ago an impromptu collaboration on Twitter led to the creation of this meme: via @christineist on Twitter I enjoy and appreciate the many self-other love and growth loops in my life, and I think there is a lot to be gained from internalizing that you get to be your own friend. It's simple but not always easy: treat yourself how you want your friends to treat you. See the good in who you are and what you do. Take good care of yourself. When you're your own friend, your friendships...
My friend asked me: How did you find the questions you are most curious about, that you are asking constantly, that you are investigating with your life? How would you help someone else to find their own questions, their own curiosity? What does the activity of considering that bring up for you? And I answered: How I found the questions feels like a fish in water scenario. There's probably things from childhood that generated my fascination with other-connection, self-connection, creativity,...